it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
