umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
