I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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