I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
