i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
