I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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