She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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