wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
