**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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