I think I won the penis lottery.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
No subtext here. People are naked.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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