I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
How external is "for external use only"?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
