he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Randomize
