I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Naked. naked and bneed help.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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