Me. At least after what I've been through.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
