i don't like sucking hair
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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