either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
