I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
