One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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