so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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