Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
