you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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