It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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