As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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