OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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