I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Randomize
