If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
