You smell like stripper and shame
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
