Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize