...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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