Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
