He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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