curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
He did a backflip because drugs
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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