I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
