Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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