i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
