Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
