Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
