Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
