he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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