We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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