She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
