dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
