I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
