i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
