insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
