If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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