Will you blow on my dice?
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
