do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
