My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
