i jhust puked up my retainher.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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