I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
